Saturday, February 26, 2005

All Out of Teen Spirit

10 things I've never done at age 20

1. Had a boy girl party. I hear they're the coolest but they must be really evil what with all the boys and girls in the same room. Maybe when I'm thirty I'll throw a small mixer to see what all the malarkey is about.

2. Been fishing. There is a picture of me holding a fish at a lake in my scrapbook but I don't remember catching it and I'll bet it was staged. Hunting makes me sad but fish are ugly and don't have personalities so killing them doesn't bother me.

3. Seen Casablanca. I'm sure it's a great movie but I just haven't had the time. Of course, there are plenty of movies I have seen that I wish had been Casablanca. Some titles include; "Shazaam," "Kate and Leopold," "Microcosmos," "Speed 2: Cruise Control," "Spice World," and "Teen Wolf 3."

4. Been to a real concert. Pretty sad, huh? Wait, does Rockappella count? No, no it doesn't. I don't like to look at it as me having never been to a concert, rather as me being one of the biggest losers I know. Seriously, I have been to a Rockappella concert. I was twelve and it was the coolest thing I had done in my life up to that point. Sadly it probably still is.

5. Kissed a boy. I don't know why this is because I have really great lips. Maybe I should stop telling boys I've been to a Rockappella concert. Perhaps I should move that rockin' boy girl party I'm going to throw when I'm thirty up ten years. We are definitely going to play spin the bottle.

6. Been tunnel singing. This is not a regret, just and observation.

7. Been to Idaho. Of course, there are a lot of places I've never been but hasn't everyone been to Idaho? Never you mind. I have no desire to go there so no harm done. Let them have their "Gem State" and be done with it.

8. Sung Michael Jackson's "Ben" at a Karaoke party. I've always wanted to but it just never happens. Let's get on this. We are definitely doing Karaoke after spin the bottle.

9. Told an employer I was quitting. I could expand here but I have already lost too much respect with the whole never been kissed thing. Here's the deal. I'm not a flake I've just never gotten around to quitting at any of my previous jobs. Oh, I guess that makes me a flake. One big flaky never been kissed flake.

10. Gotten over the death of my first pet. She was a hooded rat and her death is undoubtedly the cause of my not doing most, if not all, of the above mentioned things. Wow, I feel terrible right now.



At 7:09 AM, Blogger Julie said...

Happy Birthday you big flake! By the way, you've been kissed plenty of times, and you've had a boy/girl party--check your scrapbook, there are photos of both of these life events. And you really did catch that fish, but it was staged in the fact that it was a trout farm just off the freeway and all you did was put your pole into the water. For anyone out there intrigued by your lips, have 'em see me, you have the same lips as your father, even the part about the color spreading out over the edges of your lip line and as the kisser of those lips over the years, I can personally vouch for the quality of said lips. But remember, in the immortal words of Matt Holland, "Lips that touch Coke are like lips that smoke." I love you baby girl--have a great day. P.S. Welcome to the grown-up world, you just got a letter assigning you to jury duty.

At 11:08 AM, Blogger Bart Zamboni said...

So, I suppose Happy Birthday is in order. I stole that from the previous comment. That comment, by the way, confuses me terribly. I just don't know what to think. So if you ever want to go to a rockin' version of Casablanca in Idaho by a lake with lines in the water, you know where to find me.

P.S. I saw through one lie. There is no Teen Wolf 3. I mean I have seen a preview for one, but it lost funding and never made it into production.

At 4:56 PM, Blogger Kacy said...

I got you a VCR for your birthday. I'm going to dust it and bring it over. Black and white movies are bad for your eyes.

At 9:19 PM, Blogger Christian F said...

Happy Birthday! So why did the Zamboni mention everything but the kissing? Interesting.

At 2:12 PM, Blogger The Amazing Spider-Fan said...

AW CRAP! Mom's not commenting on my blog too, is she? IS SHE!?

Post Script:
Happy birthday Berkeley, Hope ya like crap.

At 2:15 PM, Blogger The Amazing Spider-Fan said...

What the... did Christian figure out a way to use italics while commenting, Halleluiah!

At 4:36 AM, Anonymous mitchell barton said...

whats rockapella?

At 10:07 AM, Anonymous James Oliver said...

Mitchell Barton,
On behalf of the official Rockapella fan club of Albany, I would like to invite you to the official Rockapella website for more information about upcoming concerts and events, as well as what I am sure you will find to be a delightful section on the history of Rockapella. Now, some interesting facts: Fact #1 - the current Rockapella is composed of five members - John, Scott, Jeff, Kevin, and George. Fact #2 - In the mid 90's, Rockapella was featured on the hit PBS children's series, "Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?," which helped launch them to international fame. Fact #3 - all of Rockapella's hit records are available for download from the Rockapella Store, accessible through this link:
Stay tuned for the upcoming launch of the Albany Rockapella Fans later this Fall.

Keep on Rocking,
James Oliver


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